We Mean Nothing

The brother of the man that raped me repeatedly as a kid(he’s also a child molester and molested his own children among others, his son committed suicide at 16 after hurting a child himself and couldn’t live with what he had done.) decided to try to friend me on my personal facebook page. It triggered me hard but instead of being instantly built up into a rage I’ve been trying to quiet down. Why is he trying to do this? To upset me? To somehow how get in my life? For what?

I learned that not trying to take the child rapist to court was actually the best decision. I could have prosecuted at 18 but decided not too. Felt guilty about it for years but then I find out that L (daughter of the guy that tried to friend me) tried to sue and the courts said their was no evidence. NO EVIDENCE. Her testimony as well as her mother’s was not enough evidence. Our words mean NOTHING. Out testimony is nothing. Women and children raped and molested mean nothing. The world doesn’t care unless it makes them look good. Even though only 2% are false claims, it’s better to not ruin the rapists lives but the children’s lives and adults that are raped/assaulted are ruined. No jail time, no punishment. Again, the message is that we mean nothing.



  1. Reading this triggered some emotions and memories. All items that I’ve delt with before but certainly the past keeps haunting me (is).
    My mother and her second husband (an USAF Officer) raped, sodomized and physically punished me sometimes to the point of passing out. This was on going for nearly a decade. That’s 20% of my life.
    Currently she is a minister of Blendid Families at one of Phoenix’s largest churches. As you said…. no punishment but my life nearly ruined. I speak in absolutes! I’m demanding. I hate corruption and have no room for disrespectful people, at all!
    I am not a druggie, a rapist, a murderer or a menace to society, however, if one more person says to me ….’stop living in the past and move on’ I will tear into them with a good tongue lashing!
    Thanks for sharing your journey..,


  2. Life sucks, we know. The thing you’re talking about is awful, no doubt.

    But it’s not true you mean nothing. Maybe you mean nothing for this thing, but for many people you mean a lot.

    You mean a lot for me, I do care about you, and it’s the same for a lot of people who love you.

    Think positive: think about the part of the world that cares about you, that loves you. Focus on the good things, your family, your dogs, your friends, your fans.

    They’re many more than the others.

    Think about us.

    With love, Mario.


  3. Makes me feel sick to my stomach knowing that this man tried to friend you! No remorse, no regret, no conscience!!!
    And the system stinks!! We all mean nothing to these arrogant highly paid people ‘in charge’
    Sorry for swearing but fuck the lot of them!
    You keep fighting and being you, because we love you!


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